Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Love or Respect?

In a recent poll, research showed that when a group of people were asked whether they would rather be loved or respected, the general results came back that many of the men would rather be respected while many of the women would rather be loved.

Now I know there's that whole "without respect there can never be love" bit, and the "if you love someone you do respect them", but suppose you could only have one or the other. Which would you choose?

I think women choose love because we always have these need to feel wanted by someone. We want to know that we matter and that someone considers us important enough to care. Many women in relationships end up taking the backseat and letting the man control many things anyway, so I don't think it would be as hard for them to give up respect as it would be for a man. As a result many women get pushed around just so another person will "love" them.

Men always need to feel dominant, or at least that's how I perceive it. They crave authority and power, and that's not necessarily a bad thing. They just end up being too stubborn to give in on most things because they always have to be right. (I too am definitely guilty of this.) The problem always comes when they decide to abuse the power, or never share the power on occasion.

So, as my question of the day, which would you rather have, if only given the chance to have one or the other? Love or respect?


Sarah said...

So far, everything you post corresponds to what's going on in my life. I just posted today about how I wish my mom would love me again.

As I woman, I would choose love or respect, and I think your reasons for why we do that are exactly right.


Sarah said...

Damn, i can't type right now. I meant to say "As a woman, I would choose love over respect..."

Nicole said...

I used to constantly say that guys were way too confusing. But now I know that it's relationships in general that are confusing(even though that part about guys is still true ;]), and that no matter the stand point, generally speaking, women all want the same thing. Now if we could all just feel wanted and loved in our relationships, we'd be all set :]

Sarah said...

Very true. I never understood guys. I gave up trying, if you hadn't noticed lol. But seriously, you are right. We want different things.

The benefit of being with my girlfriend is we both expect the same thing: to be wanted and loved. Since we both know that's what we want, we also know that's what we need to give, so it is SO MUCH easier than if I was with a man.

If you haven't already, you'll find the man that knows what to do for you. Believe it not, men like that do exist, they are just really hard to find.

Much love, sweetie. <3